put a lid on it

Management for the Cleveland Browns of the National Football League are interested in adding a retractable roof to the existing stadium. The proposed modification is an attempt to bolster Cleveland's chances to host a Super Bowl.

The architect/webmaster at e-quipped productions has submitted a design for consideration titled "Giant Trash Can Lid".

horrorscope

GIRL: So, what's your sign?
ME: A stop sign.
GIRL: Really?
ME: Yeah, I've had the same horoscope for the last 24 years: "People will approach you with caution, stop, and then quickly move away."

bo(red) & ti(red)

in case you didn't get the parody

high-bred

When I ride my hybrid around town people point and laugh. They might think my Hamel looks funny, but I’m saving the environment.

Abortion: The simplest way to lose that extra baby weight!